Is This Really How It Ends?

I know that I have been blessed with so many wonderful things in life.
My great husband, an amazing family, wonderful friends, everyone's health.
I have never really had to endure hardships, or tragedies...I am beyond thankful for all of that, believe me.
But what I don't understand is why I can't be blessed with a child. I don't think it's too much to ask-it's the course of life isn't it?

For those of you who don't know, we were scheduled for a frozen embryo transfer today that never happened. All 4 of our embryos did not survive to day 5, and we no longer have insurance to cover another cycle.

So my question right now is, as I try to make sense of all this, IS THIS REALLY HOW IT ENDS?
I have realized that no matter how much one prays, or how many "trinkets" of hope one has, your prayers may never be answered and your dreams may never come true. No matter how hard one tries, and how badly your heart aches for something, in the end it may never become a reality. There is NOTHING you can do to change it. No Dr. or amount of money will ever change it. Could be that life has a different course in mind for me. Nothing like what I had planned.

Where do we go from here? The way I see it there has to be something wrong with my eggs, I find it quite impossible to have all those embryos and not 1 make it to viability.
So what do we do? Do we try on our own and probably endure another loss ( or many more) ?

I am lost, broken, and just plain angry. I want nothing more in life than to have a baby, but I feel like now all I can do is throw in the towel and surrender, I have been defeated. Defeated because I just don't have the strenghth left to deal with this anymore.
 Maybe I should start wrapping my head around being a childless family.
Writing that makes me tear up, because it's not at all what I want, I just don't know what to do anymore.
I want to shout how UNFAIR this all is, but that is just plain stupid, unfair???? what is fair in life?

I am one person, a person who has used up all the strenghth they had to get through a lifetime... in the past year.

I am one person, a person who has lost 4 babies and a countless number of embryos in the past year.

I am one person, a person who has endured countless shots and hormones and pills, monitoring and surgeries, all in hopes of having a baby.

I am one person, a person who used to be willing to do anything to have a baby, only to be knocked down every single time.

I am one person, a person who dreams big, but thinks small.

I am one person, a person who falls apart on the inside when she looks at her husband knowing she is taking his dreams away too.

I am one person, a person who really thought she would make a great mother one day.

I am one person, a person whose pain goes very deep, the pain you see is only the half of it.

I am one person, a person who had so much faith before all this happened.

I am one person, a person who feels alone in all this, even though I know I am not.

I am one person, and really,  how much can one person take?

I am one person, and is this really how it ends for me?

I am one person, a person who has lost all hope.